DISCLAIMER:
A curtain opens to the darkly lit stage. Two spotlights pop on, one then the other, shining down what looks to be two large floating logs with Japanese markings on each one. And because someone thought it looked cute, both are also wearing oversized shiny black tophats.
Azaka: Hello dear audience,
Kamidake: The fiction you are about to read, was done by a man with currently very little time on his hands.
Azaka: He hopes that with the number of hentai and lemon fiction of the growing muscle variety out there,
Kamidake: That this sudden burst of what the author tends to call ‘inspiration’ that brought this idea to past, stands out from the rest.
Azaka: One way or another.
The end of a giant pencil comes into view from above, golfswing bunting the one called ‘Azaka’ into the background. The log drunkenly floats back forward to his stagelight a moment afterward. A large nervous sweatdrop appears on the other log, Kamidake.
Kamidake: If you do not understand anime fiction lingo such as ‘sweatdrops’ and ‘facefaults’, like in the scene just a moment ago,
Azaka: Please consult your local Suncoast or Blockbuster video store and ask the employees there to show you to the wide selection of anime they have to offer, especially he various Tenchi Muyo series.
Three large sacks of money with three different logos cresting them slide onto the stage beside Azaka, who hastily floats infront of the sacks in a futile attempt to hide them from view. The other log Kamidake turns to glare the best a floating log can at his partner guardian.
Kamidake: As usual and you surely already know, none of these characters are owned by the author and he is not writing this story to get PROFIT ON. In ANY way.
Another large sweatdrop slides down the face of the floating log Azaka.
Azaka: If you do not understand the small jokes and such that are within the fiction,
Kamidake: You probably do not watch any anime.
Azaka: But that does not mean you will not enjoy the numerous FMG scenes and extreme strength showcasing of the characters in the No Need For Tenchi cast,
Kamidake: Because we are pretty sure by now,
Azaka: You have most likely skipped this introduction to jump forward to the juicy bits.
Kamidake: ………
Azaka: ………..
Kamidake: Ultimately making this entire intro,
Azaka: A big waste of time.
Kamidake: ……….
Azaka: ………….
Both of the Juraian logs sit there quietly. After afew moments, a large sweatdrop slides down both of their wooden sides.
Kamidake: …As for you out there who have a large understanding of the Tenchi Muyo japanese animated series, this fanfiction story takes place within OVA continuity.
Azaka: And now,
Kamidake: Without further ado,
Azaka and Kamidake: Please enjoy the show!
----
GhenKai (kaiokibuto@hotmail.com) Presents;
A ‘No Need For Tenchi’ story.
Just Another Day...
Chapter 1: Ignition! The Beginning…
As the reporter said on the TV, it was another beautiful morning in Okayama, Japan.
"YES! ANOTHER BEAUTIFUL DAY!!" The man on TV screamed as if everyone with eyes could not see that, or didn’t hear the first three times when he shouted it.
The ferocious, once feared throughout space, retired ex-space pirate Ryoko sat cross legged on the livingroom couch infront of the TV eating a batch of leftover riceballs as she flicked through the channels.
After helping Sasami clean the stove as apart of the morning chores, The beautiful Juraian Princess Ayeka made her way through the livingroom.
"Excuse me, I know I’m wasting my time, but are you planning on EVER helping us with the morning chores, Miss Ryoko?"
Ryoko yawned. "Well if you knew you were wasting your time, then you must’ve known the answer to that question," She responded, idly biting into another riceball. Ayeka was smiling, but the sound of grinding teeth was very audible in the livingroom. Before Ayeka could open her mouth to finally respond, the spiky-haired pirate halted her with a hand.
"Hold on hold on, for the first time ever, I actually DID do my part!"
This threw Ayeka for a loop. "You did? Really?? When?"
"Just afew minutes ago, swept the outside!" She said quickly. Curiously Ayeka went to check to see if there was truth to Ryoko’s story, looking outside she saw now one leaf littered the ground from the trees! Ryoko was telling the truth!
"Well I am impressed! It looks like your finally earning yo--"
She stopped abruptly in the middle of her sentence as she heard something outside…
"o/~ Whistle while you work!! o/~" The Guardians Azaka and Kamidake sang horribly together, brooms taped to their wooden log bodies as she wavered back and forth, sweeping the ground to the best that two swaying, floating logs can. The steam coming off of Ayeka’s head was easily visible. Ryoko blanched.
"Damnit! I thought they would be done by now…"
"Who said you can use MY guardians to do what should be YOUR work!!" Walking over to the chair where Ryoko sat, she shoved a nearby broom in her hands.
"Do your own dirty work for once!"
"Awww! I’ll do it later!" Ryoko whined, shoving the broom back.
"Now!"
"Later!"
"Now!!"
"LATER!!"
It wasn’t long before the two were rolling across the floor and out the door of the house with the now broken broom, trying to shoving it back and forth to one another and hitting the other with the sticks at opportune moments.
Meanwhile Nobiyuki Masaki stumbled down from upstairs, ready for another day at the rat races, later renamed work. Problem was that he overslept, and by his calculations his arrival would end up being 15 minutes late.
"Gotta go! Gotta go! Gotta…. Heeeeeeeeeey…" Despite his desperate rambling, he found enough time to spot the show that was currently on television, a sleek and very attractive dark haired woman of ample breasts and firm backside in a workout bodysuit talking to another man, obviously in the middle of an interview. At the end of the interview, the female bodybuilder posed for the camera, giving a flex of her biceps while thrusting out her shapely chest for the camera, her nipples blatantly poking through the fabric. Nobiyuki was almost drooling.
"…Dad??" Nobiyuki nearly jumped through the roof.
"Gah! Ohh hey Tenchi! Nice day today huh? Now where was I… oh yea! Work! Gotta go!" In much haste, Mr. Masaki ran out the door. Tenchi sighed and rubbed his head.
"Lecherous old man…well, actually he would be a lecherous middle-aged maaaa--….." Tenchi found himself suddenly mesmerized by the image on TV, the woman who was in the interview now working out with some weights, the camera zooming in on her shapely calves… lean thighs… round rear… puckered sex showing through the sweat drenched outfit as she leaned over…
"TENCHI!" Sasami shouted as she dashed into the room, her cabbit friend RyoOhki sitting atop her head. She winced when the startled young man’s head slapped hard against the wood floor as he slipped and fell in a bout of frantic movement. In a way he was relieved; the well-timed fall hid away his throbbing erection that was fighting to tent his pants.
"Umm… breakfast is almost ready… R U O K?"
"Sure, sure," He responded with a nervous smile and a bruise on his head, turning off the TV and heading out the door.
"I’ll go find the others!"
Unbeknownst to him as he headed out the door were the two catlike eyes that were peeking up out of the floorboards, watching the entire scene.
"So, Tenchi likes ‘those’ types of women eh….?" Ryoko contemplated as she floated up through the floorboards. "Hmmm…."
"Found you!"
Linebackers could learn a thing or two from the ‘demure princess’s. Both of them flew across the room the hit of her perfect 10-point sack.
"Don’t you ever give up??"
"Hah; I will never give up!!"
"Breakfast is ready you know!" Sasami said to the two fighting girls.
"It is??"
"Hah!! Unguarded!"
*WHAP*
"Ouch!! YOU BIG CHEATER!"
----
Deep inside one of the largest laboratories in the known universe, consisting of the dimensional linking of multiple planets for its enormous space, ‘she’ was hard at work. ‘Science stops for nobody!’ Was one of her treasured mottoes. Day after day she spends there, sometimes days at a time, investigating the mysteries of the universe that still escaped her 20,000-year-old self.
<<Help me! Help me!>>
*BLAKABLAKABLAKABLAKA!!*
<<ROAAAR!!>> *THUD!*
"Hah! Beating my own score!!"
…Well, a person has to have fun once in awhile, don’t they?
The Greatest Scientific Genius in The Known Universe, ‘Little’ Washu Hakubi, took a drink from her bottle of soda as she aimed her gun at the screen and blew off another zombie head her game of ‘House of the Dead’.
"Whew, not bad at all, though I guess I’m having an off day!" Her hearty chuckle rang throughout her laboratory. That hearty laugh was soon suddenly drowned out by a sudden explosion deep into her lab, followed by a familiar ceremonial wail. Washu ground her teeth, now knowing that her latest security system to try to keep the resident ‘bubblehead’ out, was a failure.
"Mi…ho…shiiiii…. Well, I guess today was going alittle too good and all…"
Sulking, the defeated scientist headed off into the depths of her giant lab.
Ryoko grinned. Her plan was working well so far. Heading to the central computer hard drive, it wasn’t long before she was sorting through Washu’s zillions of files. She was lucky she was a kin to Washu; the only way one could go into her computer database was if Washu LET THEM. So of course being her daughter gives some precious advantages. 5 minutes of searching was beginning to make her edgy.
"Come on damnit…no, not that… not that either… no… man, why does Washu have to have so much crap stored on this thing… ahh here we go! This looks promising…"
According to the history of the file, what she found was a formula Washu made that ended up empowering nearly an entire race into near unstoppable superbeings for a research project 13,000 years ago. According to the file however she later improved upon the formula, and if the document was to be believed it would grant the devourer vastly exceptional strength! Unlike the catalogued results of the first batch however, there were no pictures to show the physical result of the specimen for the improved formula. She shrugged; seeing how nicely built and stacked the specimens were in the pictures who took the inferior formula, the newest batch would be the even better way to go! Can’t have too much of a good thing after all…
Hitting the Enter key, the computers went into the process of finding and retrieving the formula, in a few moments what she wanted digitized and appeared before her over the panel, floating in midair. Oddly enough, it looked like a simple blueberry muffin.
"What the? Eh, crazy old woman… ohh well, down the ha--!" A sudden potted plant flying past her face stopped her in mid sentence, smacking her hand and knocking the muffin out onto the floor. Fearing that Washu was back, she looked around, but found herself once again relieved when she found out it was only Ayeka.
"I KNEW you were up to something Ms Ryoko! You had that look on your face all through breakfast!"
"What look??!"
"This one!" Ayeka said, demonstrating the suspicious look that catered the Ex Space Pirate’s face.
"And so you followed me here into the lab. Pretty sneaky princess. You’re learning!"
"Well thank y-- Hey! I’m not trying to be a criminal like you, you hussy! Just what are you planning to do here anyway?" Ryoko feigned innocence, putting her hands up.
"Nothing at a-- hey it’s Washu!"
With a nervous eek, Ayeka ducked behind a large piece of machinery in reflex of possibly being caught; but it was only a trick by the demoness, who laughed it up.
"Hahahahaha! You’re probably down here for the same reason as I am!"
"I AM NOT! Umm…. What exactly are you down here for anyway?"
Ryoko stood up and walked over to the muffin that lay on the floor, picking it up.
"To eat muffins."
"To what--" It quickly clicked in the Juraian Princess’s head that something obviously was not right with this scenario. She knew if anything, she had to stop Ryoko from eating that strange but simple looking muffin. It almost seemed like time slowed down around them as sped toward her rival for the heart of Tenchi as fast as her feet could carry her. She ran at breakneck speed, she was almost there…
And Ryoko was already swallowing last of the muffin, having stuffed it into her mouth whole. The defeated princess was staring at the cocky grin of a triumphant Demoness as she gave a ‘V’ictory sign two inches from her face.
It was silent for acouple of seconds more before Ayeka finally spoke.
"And …so … what is that supposed to do anyway?"
Ryoko blinked… "Well, make me into one of those fitness buffs like on TV…" Ayeka scratched her head.
"A fitness buff? … Is it working?"
Ryoko looks up at the ceiling for a moment as if thinking, before she answered.
"I… don’t know… don’t feel any different yet…"
After afew seconds, Ayeka laughed triumphantly with a hand over her mouth.
"Ah HAH! Why would you want to make yourself look like a man anyway?" She chided, "Although you COULD go for one and all. You should go for the facial hair too while your at it, or do you think Tenchi really wants to marry a MAN? Buuut, obviously whatever you ate doesn’t work with your metabolism so it was all for naught anyway!"
Ryoko fumed, red in the face as she stamped forward, grabbing the Princess by the collar of her clothing.
"I am NOT trying to look like a man! Listen here princess!!"
"….."
Ryoko suddenly became quiet with a queasy look on her face. Ayeka tilted her head curiously becoming abit concerned with her spiky cyan-haired rival.
"…Yes? I’m listening…."
The biggest belch she’d yet to hear rung through the Juraian Princess’s ears and echoed through the lab. When it was finished, Ayeka’s hair looked as if she’d just skipped through a hurricane.
"Ex…scuse… me…."
"… That was…. rather… foul… don’t you think…?" Both of the beautiful ladies stared at eachother quietly for a long moment, Ryoko red in the face from embarrassment after her unruly burp. She felt Ryoko’s grip suddenly snap tighter around the collar of her purple kimono, followed by the sound of fabric ripping. Thinking Ryoko was tearing her clothes, she looked down at the sound of the tears and found out that it was not her own clothing that was shredding, as they both watched her sleeves stretch tight to the bursting the point. They did just that a split second afterward, and Ayeka felt herself being lifted higher off her feet despite Ryoko continuously holding her at face level…
--
"Well this is definitely a new record," The 20,000-year-old genius mumbled as she carried one unconscious and swirly-eyed Mihoshi Kurumitsu towards the exit of her lab. 14 of specimens released, 11 of them vicious and dangerous, and 29 of her older inventions destroyed in the process, all because she decided to come in for Sasami to tell her it was lunch would be soon be ready.
"Just how the hell DOES she manage to get in here like that?!"
She sighed. It was probably another of the universe’s greatest secrets.
But as she stumbled back to her mainframe, she noticed that acouple of girls had gotten into another of those ‘universal secrets’, one that she kept under a personal lock and key.
--
A wide grin was spread on Ryoko’s face as her body swelled and grew, her breasts savagely exploding through the front of her blue and yellow striped dress as they bloated to massive proportions. Once sleek and slim legs blasted to massive sizes, and her and sultry hips and round rear raised higher, giving more a seductive arch to her delectable lower anatomy. Her brown traveling socks also tore away, her feet staying in proportion to her enormous growing body, the blue collar to her once loose dress the only thing to survive the entire transformation, stretched tightly around her thick neck muscles, her longer spiked hair cascading down to her lower back to mid thigh, afew locks hanging over her shoulders. Her gold catlike eyes seemed to sparkle with a new inner light. Immediately Washu’s mind went to work.
"Hmmm, 11’9 feet tall, 18,405 pounds due to muscle density (give or take afew pounds), 70 inch biceps, 110 inch thighs, 64’ calves, and a Bust Waist Hips measurement of I would guess; 195, 84, 181."
"Now with all that having been said; WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE?!!"
"Washu she ate some kind of muffin and grew into some amazon She Hulk on me and I can’t get loose!" Ayeka wailed, flailing and kicking the arms and legs of the Space Pirate, who seemed to be lost in her own world after the throes of her previous growth spurt chuckling maniacally under her breath.
"MAN what a rush! Now THAT’S what I call a good muffin!" The Super-grown space pirate laughed maniacally as she looked down at herself, surprised at how large she now was.
"Wow! Well, if Tenchi likes buff women, I’ll give that to him in spades!" She guffawed as she poked an enormous and impossibly firm, near beanbag-sized breast, watching the nipple spring erect to a point that only a woman of her new stature could, pulsating forth powerfully to a six inches long and 2 inches thick at the thoughts of the possible reactions Tenchi would have to her new body.
"Mwahahaahaaaaah!! Seeya later princess!" She said as she dropped her rival to the floor and teleported out of the lab.
"HEY!! No fair!! Get back here you giant hussy!!!"
"Ohhh, I get it; someone got into my ‘Xenoma’ files? Am I right?" Washu asked.
"Umm… well… I guess" Ayeka said timidly and a tad confused. Whatever Ryoko just turned into had to be whatever this Xenoma thing was.
"Hmnm, I see. I wonder what are the conditions that led up to this predicament…"
"But, aren’t you going to change her back, Little Washu?" Ayeka asked. Washu thought about it for afew moments…
"Naaaaah!"
To Be Continued…